Left with 1 more week.
Hais.. 1 wk and i have to study for Os and finish my hmwk and revision stuff.
Dont really have any hope in finishing all tasks.

I did not do any cip this holiday.
sad.. really sad....
Chen Ying Tong cancelled the cip cuz he say gt h1n1???
haha. actually nt.
my dad is so damn cool. (not gonna say it here)

Speaking of my dad,
fathers day is today!!!
cux its past 12am already.
hahaha.
i've already bought my fathers day present.
shld i give it to him when he comes back or after i get up from bed??

HOMEWORK HOMEWORK HOMEWORK!!!
grrr.....
i really need a place to do my work.
too much distraction in my home.
tv, com.... ugh.
My room is so crammed and i can do nth about it.
i share it with my siblingSSS and u only have one way in and one way out.
haisss... i have no words to describe it. hopeless le.
i wish wish wish wish wish i have a room all by my own!!!!
have to get really serious in my work now, but i cnt seem to find the motivation to work.
once i decided to do smthng, i will thought of other things that i need to do and thus kena distracted again.

I WANT TO read books, do research for IPW, go for dental appointments, do revision, cleaning, help people out(but i cnt even handle myself now), finish my homework, go out with friends, go east coast park again, overnight, go to co, brush up on FYQJ and TLBB. Theres so much things i wanna do!!! But i somehow not know how to plan my time anymore.
its DISASTROUS!!!!!
Im not even sure i am ready for O level.
Which is like a year away from me.
I have to wake up. really have to..
but it does not seem like there is any solution to my problem.
i know what i SHOULD DO, but i just cant DO IT.
DISTRACTIONS!! or maybe its MYSELF or LAZYNESS...
i certainly dun think im all that lazy, i just cnt bring myself to be all into the tasks.
ugh. forget it.

Class Outing at EAST COAST PARK.
It was fun generally.
really wanna stay there the whole night,
dun really feel like leaving.
IT IS SO NICE OVER THERE!!!!!
The wind, the trees, the sea..
awww... how i wish i can go again.
how i wish i can live there nearby.
Actually, i think i'll be able to study there. a very very nice place indeed.
ok, so back to topic.
I met wanyi outside the lrt station and saw gabriel.
haha. board the train with him and met huaihui at one of the stops.
Got to pending and wait for other people to come.
got there and we walked quite a long way to our bbq pit.
enjoyed the walk though, the wind was blowing so comfortable, yet so irritating sometimes.
The girls hair flew around madly and i dun really care about mine.
i just let it fly. its not use brushing or trying to hold it into place over and over again right?
the wind will still blow it into a mess. haha.
finally reached the pit and everyone just settle down.
to me, its rather boring at first. VERY VERY BORIIING!!!
But the we played truth or dare, which becomes DOUBLE DARE later???
Quite fun, shall'nt go into the details.
Then some people started bbq-ing.
I did not help in bbq, cux its so crowed already.
Walked around and try to find something to do.
i guess they dun need any help, so i just watch the sea and play with the sand.
when the food was ready i just eat.
wanted to help bbq, but everyone seems like they want the job. haha.
so, i got myself some beehoon and sit with xinyu, huai hui and jennifer.
the wind was strong and jennifer's plate of beehoon fly towards me.
LOLOLOLOLOLOLS..
luckily it did not hit me. nearly though. ahah.
so the rest of the day is just games, bbq, photos, sand.
When the night almost sets, i saw andrea sitting by herself digging a hole?
haha. went to check it out and we dug the hole so deep that it reached water level!!!
yes!! we saw water!! its like a mini well. lols.
in the end my limbs were sandy so i just soak half my body into the water.
in the end, i got more sand into my shorts!!
bloody...
thus huaihui and wanyi accompany me to the washroom lor.
washed my legs from the water cooler. haha. damn cool.
went back and played a few more rounds games and eat a few more sticks of food,
i went home wanyi.
we were finding our way back home while both of us were punching numbers madly on our phones. haha.
then i realised that i forgot my drenched clothes. LOLS.
on the bus, wanyi and i just chat about the past 2/7 and stuff.
haisss... quite comforting.
time flies, and we gt to the lrt station alr.
reached home around 11+pm everything was fine until...
my oarents came back and they began throwing words at me.
DAD: Why so late come back???(talking with some flames)
then my mum continues
MUM: Don't you even thought about going out again!!!(shout)
ME: ...???
whats going on???
i thought i text-ed:
i go home at 9pm?
Then she said that i dun keep my promise to REACH home by 9pm.
When did i even say that???
I say GO HOME, not REACH HOME!!!!
wth. i cnt argue, oso dun hv the energy to argue anymore.
thus, im officially GROUNDED!!!!
haisss....
But i must admit that i overshot by hanging out till 9.30pm.
However, her reason is not avail too!!!
urgh.. nvm!

I have so much to say...
She went batam for competition yesterday and came back just now.
Her handphone was lost.
Then she came back and started showing us what she bought.
Generally, theres some clothes, accessories and some food.
LOLS. She bought me 4 T-shirts.
After all that commotion, she started to go abit short wired again.
MUM: Why din u help me do some housechores? Why din u bring in the clothes? You see, why the table so messy?? The floor so dirty. blah blah blah.
lols. its already like that when she left and why is she so surprised when she saw all these when she came back?

Nevermind!!! Not in the mood to blog le.
BYE!!

HIHIHIHIHIHHI!!!!

back again.
very bored these days.
i really need to start chiiong-ing for my olvl liao.
T.T
But tmr is the class outing, hope that it will be fun.
at east coast, during the afternoon.
seriously, i dun think i am quite bonded to the class yet, but i will try my best.
Studies and CO is my main priority now.
Im so inspired by little things sometimes that i thought that im thinking too much.
but who really cares?

went to read some blogs just now.
totally not motivational.
im totally sian-ed.

Today:

Slept for 3hrs and struggled top climb out of bed to get ready for CO.
Met siying at the mrt station and went to hong kah CC.
was feeling very very weak cux im so starved and lack of sleep.
Seriously, i suck at my techniques now. have to brush up on it.
and i think my brain is dying, cant seem to remember things.
for example, i cnt memorise the score. not that its neccessary, but i need to look at the scores most of the time, which i do not like at all.

So, after we were released from combine session,
siying, me and another liuqin de snr went to the STAGE room to practice on our own.
inside the room there are two drum sets and we straight away go and mess around with it, haha.
so nice la. there are big amplifiers, mics, drumsets, electric guitar, some techno stuff etc etc.
I am like WOW!
but damn! we cnt find the air-con remote, so we just on the fan, which made me sian diao.
at least theres some ventilation, so we wont die in there. haha.

practice and practice then i thought to myself,
Im so gonna to spend some time with my pipa every weekend.
11.46am, i think, we stop practcing and chit chat.
academic stuff and it just happened that the snr is also a bio student,
siying go crazy with her about bio stuff.
abit sian cuz i have nth to contribute to the conversation,
plus, im stuck between the two bios,
so it kind of weird.
but still, i learned quite alot from her.
about graduation to jc, poly and stuff.
the snr is from SP!!! and she is damn pro in studies.
she touched and see DEAD HUMAN BODIES before!!!
how cool is that?
and the bodies are in the sch lab!

after that went to causeway to shop for siying's performance black shirt.
it is when i realised how boring and meaningless it is to go to bugis and far east to shop.
i dunno why, but i enjoy shopping in shopping centres more.(provided u have the money to spend)

I wanna start on my HCL stuff already and i dun really feel like going to 2/7 outing anymore.
i might as well organise the outing.
gabriel... haisss.. no hope liao la.
say so much, in the end?? until now still hvnt decide the date.

I think that im spending too little time with my family.
i mean, i spend most of my time during the holidays in my house.
but i dun really do things with them. you know? like, im doing my own stuff and they're doing theirs.
i shld really spend some thoughts and time on my life already.
its quite a challenge, with my mum and dad so busy, and me, that seems to be busy,but not.
im not really sure what my point is, but i just realised that i shld really do something about balancing my life.

Another problem, i thought i set targets to exercise every week>?
but in the end, i hvnt run, never jog never done any exercise till now.
yet i am dreaming of crossing the line when im taking my retest for standing broad jump.
fat hope, i know.
haisss.... if i cnt pass my broad jump, this will be my first time failing NAPFA.
but if i manage to pass, i will get my silver!!! lols..
so conclusion is, i have to plan my time and get my butt moving.
no point planning and not following it right?

from tmr onwards, it will be school work all the way.
then i'll pack and go for my camp. hope that i will have the courage to try out new things.
first day is all the high elements and stuff. all on land activities.
the next day is all water. water rafting, kayaking, cross the river or something.
hope that it will turn out to be fun and enjoyable.
third day is pack up, cleaning and go home.
after the camp will be Olvl already.

oral...facing alot of problems recently.
its my expression and language.
it became very weird to talk sometimes,
my pronounciation, my tone, my vocabs..
i have to speak up, but i have NOTHING to SAY.
or sometimes, NO ONE TO TALK TO.
even if i studied the points for the oral topics,
i may not do well for my expression.
reading the passage.
another rather major problem.
i dun bother to check out how the chinese words are pronounced and just skip the words when im reading story books.
so, im quite worried that i may find some words difficult.
and I CAN'T READ FLUENTLY!
shit me. i suck.

WHATEVER!!!
i think i'll just talk to the wall and become a freak.
talking to myself unconsciously...
okok, enough.
so thats about all, some issues i have there.
lets talk about something POSITIVE!!!
haha.
nth much to talk about really.
if tmr turns out good,
maybe i'll blog again and talk about it.
if not....depends.

haisss..
going le.
wasting my time again.
have to sort out my thoughts.
gtg.
BYE!
=)

haiss.. so long never post le.
just come by to see how is it.
very bad.... almost dead. alright, its DEAD!

well, i missed out quite alot of things huh.
since my last post is about the so-long-ago step down thing.
okay, lets start with what i remembered.

Monday, 8am

Reached school and i think tchers were late so we waited for almost 1/2 hr.
-.-
Then we start to clear out all the instruments.
put them into the drama room.
and then bring out all the cases and stands etc etc.
after all instruments and school properties are out,
we proceed to clean the room.

Interesting discovery.
We found charcoal, knife, old photos of ex-co members, paper plates, some bbq stuff, a decade ago de CO shirt, some weird criss cross thing, umbrella, more instruments, banners....
and LOTS and LOTS of DUST!!
WOW!!! KNIFE!! haha, damn cool man!!!

Basically, thats all.
Recently, im busy doing cross stitch.
haha. finished my first cross stitch already.
siying and i search the whole box of cross stitch and DIY stuff at the shop,
sacrificing our faces just to find my stupid pisces cross stitch design!!!
grrrrr.... it took us so damn looooong!!!
haha, but we managed to find it in the end.
thanks to siying's never-say-die attitude.
LOLS.

Other than doing cross stitch,
im also in LOVE with "THE PERFECT GIRL"
haha. its a book about murderers, investigators solving mysteries, something like that.
its terribly, horribly, verily SICKO!!!
you can learn how to preserve bodies and various ways of killing people!!! hahaha.
i sound like a killer.
But, its so so so so COOL!!!
killer tie the victim to the bed of something,
then he'll pour boiling water on the victim.
next, he use a brush or something and scrub away the skin of the victim, tormenting her.
This makes the killer feel even more satisfied as the victim screams from the torture.
And this will continue, scrubbing the skin, layer by layer,
until the bone is seen and the victim dies.
HOW COOL IS THAT????
haha. anw, the point is, its full of intepreting from evidences etc stuff,
not really all that killing stuff.
But you can really learn ALOT!!!
haha.
At the end of the story is really very sad luh.

Im gonna proceed on to the other books i borrowed from the library.
however, i must finish them by this week.
As in, finish all my entertainment, non-school stuff by this week, so i can concentrate on my olvl HCL ORALLLL!!!!!
haisss... pressurrre.

2/7 class outing not out yet.
3/8 one oso.
i think probably next week le.
sooo... maybe 2days out.
Thus, i must really chiionng like hell.
then fourth week is damn busy de.
Geog class, CO, homework(sure have some to chioong de), camp, hcl Os...
Im BUSY!! for crying out loud!!

Oh ya, i hvnt make my dental appointment, and i have to go to this performance thing for the hong kah north cc, which i dunno when is it.
And becuz of this performance, siying and i have to learn a new song piece.
not really hard, but we need a few more practice.
And i think we only have combine practice during sundays.
haisss...
really dun have time le.
should not waste anymore precious time.
cuz YOUTH=TIME
TIME=MONEY
YOUTH=MONEY
Thus, if we waste time, we will waste our youth.
and if u watse ur youth u lose ur money.
which can also mean ur futurre.
lols. what kind of thinking is that??
haha. anw, im going bonkers, so dun blame me. hah.

Went out with LAOZZiiiiii today.
Go far east. lolzzz...
Got reminder that gather day is coming and my mum's bdae is coming.
AND, im only left with LITTLE money to spend.
sooo, today went to hunt for presents.
managed to buy mum's present and dad's is more of a challenge.
so, i spent most of the time hunting for it and FINALLY!!!
but i din bring enuf money..
so, yup, maybe tomorrow go buy.
-.- i know....

And OMG!!!
Im in love with STAY REAL also!!!
Thanks to LAODA!!! for the influence.
And the LUO ZHI XIANG the shop, which is the only shop in singapore and happen to open at far east plaza, which i happen to step into today also had my eyeballs pop-out(nearly).
STAGE.
haisss.... sometimes i just wished im a male.
cux male's clothes is obviously easier to buy and easier to categorize.
as in, the type of clothings and shoes and accessories are so easy to differentiate.
unlike girls' so complicated.
like, this must come with this. this match this.
then when wear what. how u shld wear. what type of clothes suits or not suit u.
really, its complicated and troublesome.
haisss... but i can live with it.
dun go out much, so dun really care liao.

then, while im looking out for my dad's present, a shop provide printing service.
as in, tee-printing that kind.
Someone said that i can print "I LOVE MY DAUGHTER" on the tee and give it to mny dad,
haha. LOLS. i totally love that idea!
But im dun really have any idea how im gonna make the tee.
its like too much words and i dun really know whether it will suit my dad, haha.
plus, the tee is about $49.90!!!
im like, okaye, over budget, forget it.
haisss... really hope can finish my shopping stuff tmr.

Went back home and felt really sick today.
went out with family to eat dinner at jurong point.
eat eat eat then i thought my mum tell me that we are short of money and someone interrupted.
dunno whether is i hear wrong or what.
anw, i can sense that something is wrong.
what i can do now is maybe help my parents reduce their burdens by helping them with the housechores, SAVE MONEY, study hard, not quarrel and get too involve in any conflict between my siblings....
my dad is really stress, and so is my mum.
but somehow i feel that the stress my mum is encountering is not very necessary.
however, since she carried the responsibility, she must be responsible for her actions.
sometimes, their actions makes me feel like they are going thru menopause.
you know? bad temper etc. haha
and what makes it more interesting is that they also "suspect" that each other is going thru menopause.
hahahahahhahaha.
well, they are not even 45!

i think, thats alot of crap i had written.
sorry, but thanks for bearing with it.
who asked u to read!!! haha.
no la. jkjk.
tag on my tagboard!! haha.
by blog is DEAD!!!
=)

30/4/09

Seniors finally step down.
Rather emotional day for me. Realised loads of things too.
Chuhui's temperature shot up to 38degrees.
And cher dun let her go, she cried.
So did we. But me, i did not really, cux i am believed that she will come.
The talk with hanlu during the bus ride let me realised how much i actually love co.
Time flies. This year is hectic and life is at a fast pacing.
Sometimes, i really felt like giving up on co, but i always managed to get my passion for it.

We were at tuning our instruments at the void deck and Nanyang Girl's CO waved at us. Asking us where we are from. Sufang, me and i think layleng, tried to shout to them CCKSS and even wanna do sign language. LOLS.
The rehearsal was ok, just that the audience spolit the mood.

Took lots of photos that day and i really want to keep all of them.
When i get hold of them, i'll make them into an album.
So when i open the covers one day, i can see the faces and memories again.
Without the seniors, CO wun feel like CO.
But times change and you must go with the flow,
people have to move on and we must take things on the positive side.
Its not the end of the world, and its not like they are gone for good.
I believe they will come back, and train our juniors for the next syf.
GOLD will be ours!!!

Really have to thank our snrs, instructors and everyone who make that day so memorable.
When im on the stage, i did not really pressurize myself.
Im just relaxing and the music just comes out.
Enjoy, i told myself.
And i think we did better than syf.
Indeed, the results are not the MOST inportant,
its the process, the times we had together.

CO will be the best part of my life in CCKSS.
We sweat tgt, get scolded tgt, and have fun tgt.
We will always stick as one.
Time is short, and i will never waste my time on stupid things.
In 7-8months, the sec3s will embark on the hectic life of sec4 again.
The fresh pressure and stress.
Now, we are here, left with some time, we shld really treasure.
Really, dun take things for granted.

After the showcase,
the pipas went to the CC for a celebration.
Its rather crazy really.
Getting ourselves so smelly. haha.
Credits to my snow stuff.
i dunno what its called.
We drank champagne and we went to the court to play sparkles.
haha. it was dark there, so it was rather suitable to play these kind of things.
Heart-attack(ed) and i smaked laoer's hand.
haha. her penalty: spraying a thick coat of the snowy stuff. wakaks.
had fun, really.

That night,
its like waking up from a long and wonderful dream.
But, everything is true.
That day was even important to the snrs.
Wish them the best of luck for the Olvl.
=)

i'll never forget.

School today was fair.
Kept waiting for the time to come.
Omgosh!!! Tmr is The day, TMR iS THE DAY!!!!!!!

i have an essay to do and no ideas are coming in.
oh shucks. how am i gonna sleep early??
I really want to bring bananas to school tmr.
it will be so cool. yeah?? haha.
came home and saw a bunch of bananas on the table. wakakas. XD
mom bought it.

SYF tomorrow~~
14hrs more!!!!!! *screams*
Im sure CO can de!!! GO GO GO!!! GAMBETTE!!!!
Today's performance not bad!! Tmr JIAYOUSS!!!
Yatyan is gonna hug me tmr?? haha.
she promised. =X
And im meeting the pipas tmr in mac at 6-6.15am!!!
Meeting time is 7am tmr.
Chuhui promised wake up call.

No inspirations to write essay sia.
the topic so sian and ive run out of creative juices.
haisss...
Now my mind is filled up with CO~!

tts all.
Wish me and CO the BEST of LUCK!!!!!
wakakakas.
XD

OMG.
CO practice, mid year, deadlines.
Im stressed out!!!!
tHEREs too little time in this world.

In presch, a year is forever and a day is equal to a week.

In pri sch, i'll think that A MONTH is equal to a year.

When i reached sec1, A Month became rather short.

This year, a week is equal to 3days.
Every hour are halved.

Is this world moving too fast or am i moving too slow?

I have to save money from now on,
outings, presents.
haiss...

I din know that i'll be taking my mt paper until siying told me when we got off from the bus.
My eyes nearly pop out lor.
I still thought we have two more weeks.

mR lau taught us physics today.
OMGosh, he is so so cool la.
and his stick man rocks.
Laoer say if we are lucky, we may be our cher nxt yr.
waahhh, 3/9 is envied.

Cindy was comparing height with laoda today then laoer burst the bubble and say
"Tall so what, oso cannnot earn money."
very realistic indeed.haha.

Hanlu moved to NORTHVALE.
wow. this is old news. contradicting. old-news. old and new. duh.

Im a boring person.
Colours drained out of me.
Fill in some colours for me please.
Im black, white and grey, maybe just a blank piece of paper.
hmmm.....
whatever. i have no life.

Finished some of my hcl work liao.
Chinese standard droppppp...
how>>?? whhooooo caaannn heelp me??
haisss.. its still me, alone in the end.

Maybe im used to being bored, nonchalant, lazy, colourless, non-enthusiastic, lonely.
byebye world.
a total diferent person now.
to think positively, start anew.
But its just too late. pessimist now.

Friday:
Had night practice till 8pm.
Damn shiok. All inspirations and feel comes in.
Dayang conduct the whole co after Conductor lee went home.
I dunno if he was trying to be humorous or what, but he sure made us all laugh.
Felt abit bad larh.
Wanna spent the whole night with co lorhh, but dayang....
haiss...

Yesterday:
Sleep till 11+ then wake up.
Slack and then evening then do some work.
Im still stuck at indices and surds.

Today:
Woke up early in the morning, 9+am!
WAHAHA.
But wasted 2hrs watching channel eight. haha.
Missed my pipa.
Should have brought my pipa home lor.

Left about less than 20days before syf.
haisss... time passes so fast.
I really dun wan snrs to step down lor.
not fun without them. no one help us to cover up our mistakes during combine practice.

Exams coming in May.
Cham..
Have to start revising le.
Wasted one week on....
I cannot rmb.
Mum drove me to sch one day and asked me if i can still cope with sch.
i said" Still can la. but beginning to struggle abit le."
Then she asked me to concentrate on studies first and put co aside, cux not so important.
Haiss... she dunno how much i love co.
How can i neglect co? Syf coming and snrs are stepping down.
I must treasure every second i have with co.